I am diligently studying OB right now. Really.

[ocelot]

(Disclaimer: This scenario is in no way related to my own life. I'm just curious, because I've seen this issue pop up in multiple locations now, so it seems to be a fairly common way of thinking.)

Partner A and B are an opposite-sex couple in a committed, up-to-this-point-monogamous relationship. For the sake of simplicity of explaining (and because this is how it has been in the situations I've seen so far), A is female and B is male. Partner A is bisexual, and partner B is heterosexual.

Partner A decides that she would like to explore her bisexual side and have an encounter/relationship/whatever with another female. Partner B says "Sure, if I can do the same with a female."

Partner A logs onto the internet, explains the situation, and says that this is unfair. She would happily let Partner B have a relationship with another male, though. Multiple people agree that it is unfair, and allowing him to also have a homosexual side-relationship is an adequate solution.

Disregarding any issues of the morality or practicality of an open and/or same-sex relationship... What's your opinion of the situation? Is it fair for Partner B to request the same freedom with a member of the opposite sex? Is Partner A's solution of giving the freedom to explore with a member of the same sex fair, considering that Partner A does not actually have interest in exploring with a member of the same sex?

(If you can't disregard the morality/practicality, don't feel you have to answer. Or answer if you want, anyways. I'm just procrastinating. I'm tempted to post to Booju, too.)

Comments

[therealocelot.livejournal.com]

It seems likely that Partner B's declaration of "if you do that, then I want another woman," is less a genuine statement of interest than a way to stop Partner A from pursuing an outside relationship at all. ;)

I agree with this. However, saying "You can sleep with a man" when she know he'll do nothing of the sort seems like a similar form of passive aggression.

Kind of like going to the store to get dessert to share, and grabbing chocolate ice cream knowing the person you're sharing with hates chocolate.

[kuangning]

No argument here. In any case, I would just think they deserve each other, and potential outside interests are well clear of them. ;)